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Jokes and
Laughs |
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Materialistic Lawyer
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in
front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a
truck passed too close and completely tore off the door on the driver's side.
The lawyer immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes
a policeman pulled up.
Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions,
the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked
up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same,
no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting
and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief. "I
can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are
so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the
lawyer.
The officer replied, "Don't you know that your left
arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn
off when the truck hit you."
"My God!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex?"
Sausages
There was an Ghanaian lady married to a English gentleman who had moved to London. The
poor lady was not very proficient in English, but any how managed to
communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop
for groceries.
One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy
pork legs. She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in
desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs. The butcher got the message and
the lady went home with pork legs.
The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again,
she didn't know how to say it, and so unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher
he breasts. The lady got what she wanted.
The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. She
brought her husband to the store...
Question: What were you thinking?
Hellooo!, her husband speaks English!
Funny Thoughts
One day a college professor of Psychology was greeting
his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and said,
"Would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up?"
After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up.
"Well, good morning. So, you actually think you're amoron?" the professor asked.
The kid replied, "No sir, I just didn't want to see
you standing there all by yourself.
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