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“WHAT NEXT?”
Nachi Aguboshim
(Nachi,
like most African Children born in the diaspora
is trying to redefine himself.
He writes with passion and an open mind. Nachi
is an intern at the youth desk of African Echo
media group.) |
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YOU THINK back to the days when you were in college and even jumping forward to when you were in university. As you went through your various courses, the revision, the exams, even the coursework there was something that remained clear in your mind, some might even call it the light at the end of the tunnel, that being the words:
‘Just a few more months of this and I’m done’
Back then these words made so much sense to you that along with the freedom that university presented had you somewhat deluded.
As mature as you thought you were it was clear you weren’t. You strongly felt that your learning process stopped once you closed the books that you rejected so much through your academic career.
Growth was only just around the corner, and being part of a somewhat controlled academic life you discarded the need for self-development due to the implications of the frantic academic system that you were part of. Failing to realise that you weren’t mentally ready for what life was about to present. And despite the wisdom offered by friends and family you refused to listen, your pride had become dangerous, especially as you were narrow- minded.
Stepping out into the real world however forced you to realise that you hadn’t made that conversion from child to adult. Though you may have looked the part you clearly weren’t and with that unbalance you couldn’t progress in anything that you put your time into. This lead to you continuously making mistakes and the worse thing about it was that you were aware of what needed to be done to make improvements within your life. However you wouldn’t address these issues, as that would merely highlight the fact that others around you where right and therefore stating your faults. And your pride wouldn’t permit you to do that.
However, unknown to yourself, something from my past was to be the catalyst in your process of self development. As you sat back and remained comfortable within the confines of your decaying lifestyle, you opened up your notebook from college and begin to read a piece you started but never finished entitled, ‘What’s next’ and it read:
‘You wake to reflect on a life that for many reasons haven’t gone in the direction that you would of wanted it to go. Frustrated at the way people around you have excelled within their individual journeys where you have stay fixed in a depressing position, you look at yourself in the mirror and think . . . . . What’s Next?’
‘Your reflection is different, as you no longer recognise what is projected back to you. Optimism has been replaced with disbelief, aims that seemed so achievable in the past, when they were first conceived are now a distant memory and you feel the same way about yourself, your head lowers as you again think. .What’s Next?’
‘You try to gather your thoughts in an attempt to acknowledge at what stage your life went into this downwards spiral. However by doing this you merely subject yourself to more frustration, could this be because you can’t pin point when the change occurred or is it because you realise that the only change has been the changes that have occurred in your negative mentality, either way you are left wondering . . . . What’s Next?’
You close the notebook, watching as it slowly slips through your finger tips the truth is a bitter pill to swallow, as your words hit you harder then anything anyone has said to your previously. The next step is yours . . . . . What’s Next?’
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